Quote of the Week: Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin
George Carlin, who passed away in 2008, is widely regarded as one of the best stand-up comedians of all times. Personally, I am not a fan of his use of words that push the limits of censorship. Yet, quotes like this one demonstrate his keen insight without using off-color language!
Do these things frustrate you?
- People who drive so slowly that you have to sit through another red light
- Drivers who weave in and out of traffic at high speeds on interstate highways
- People who “shuffle” five-abreast at the airport when you have a tight connection
Even if you have a calm overall demeanor, it’s human nature to get frustrated when people go slower (or faster!) than you.
If it’s not slow drivers or slow walkers that frustrate you, perhaps it’s people who take forever to answer a simple question. Feeling that things are “going too slow” can relate to the pace of almost anything – even movies or sporting events. You just want things to speed up!
Many of our college coaching clients with ADHD get frustrated when their teachers take a long time to explain a concept. They also get frustrated when they have to read unfamiliar material very slowly. It challenges their ability to focus and retain information. Our adult clients with ADHD experience comparable difficulties at home and at work.
One of the most helpful strategies for managing frustration is being “mindful.” In short, that means just “being” in the moment. With practice, you can learn to be mindful when others drive too slow or go too fast. Just following your breath for 30 seconds can help you become calm and centered.
We recommend developing a daily meditation practice, even if for only 5 – 10 minutes. Even if for only 3 minutes! Meditation trains the brain to be more mindful.
Meditation Websites/Apps We Recommend
- MindfullyADD – www.mindfullyadd.com
- Stop, Breathe & Think – www.stopbreathethink.org (also an app)
- Headspace – www.headspace.com (also an app)
Questions for Reflection:
- Would you say you are a reasonably patient person who accepts the pace of events around you?
- What are the situations or behaviors that “try your patience,” as the saying goes?
- What strategies keep you from getting derailed when things frustrate you?
- How can you stay in a state of “mindfulness” when you want things to go slower or faster?
- Do you have a daily meditation practice? If not, how about starting at 10-minutes daily?
Thanks for the post, Dennis! Following the breath is the simplest and most helpful mindfulness technique I have learned. It’s great for all kinds of situations – to name a few: stress, interpersonal conflict, anger management, job interviews, falling to sleep, and physical pain.
I agree that our breathing patterns are critical to self-regulation. Yet, breathing is something that we do all the time! Being AWARE of our breathing and adjusting our breathing patterns can become a habit. Many of our college student clients develop a new awareness of their breathing during a school semester. Unfortunately, that habit is often suspended during their summer breaks! To serve us well, habits need to be practiced year-round – or they will not “kick-in” when we need them!
That’s true, Dennis. I like to do 5 – 10 minutes of mindful reading and meditating at the beginning of each day. Doing it year-round builds resilience for stressful times – like during final exams!