Forego your anger for a moment and save yourself 100 days of trouble. Chinese Proverb
This quote is apparently thousands of years old! To me, it closely aligns with another quote: “Almost everything is easier to get into than to get out of.” Agnes Allen
Saying (or writing) our negative thoughts when we are angry or upset can certainly create relationship issues. These issues can go on for days, months, or even years!
In our work as conflict coaches, we often help clients identify situations or behaviors that “trigger” their anger or other negative emotions. As the Chinese Proverb suggests, it is usually better to hit the pause button than to speak our minds or send an angry text or email.
Of course, there are times when someone may be extremely tired or just not feeling well. On those occasions, it is challenging to follow the wisdom in the Chinese quote!
Questions for Reflection
- In what kinds of situations is it most difficult for you to manage your anger or other negative emotions?
- What strategies have you learned to help you regulate your potentially negative responses?
- What are the consequences of unregulated anger in your personal relationships?
- How are the consequences similar or different in your work environment?